YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHO MY FATHER WAS TO ME GROWING UP - Musings on Father's Day - June 18th, 2017

I grew up knowing my father as my mother’s number one fan, a medical doctor, a lover of people and animals too, my very playful and generous dad, a Leader, and God’s favorite son.

I was a little girl. But I knew him to be all that and more. More because he loved me and my siblings too much. So much so that every afternoon was my birthday. Yes, as soon as dad comes back home, my older siblings and I gather round the balcony of the children’s parlor (as we called it then) and we start singing my birthday song. I don’t know how it started, that was just our tradition then. I don’t know how it ended either. I guess my big sister Chineme will have a clue. I also remember very clearly our outing day – Sundays. I mean, EVERY Sunday. We went everywhere, - amusement park, Okada wonderland, Zoo, Uniben park, Nifor – I mean, on Sundays, you wouldn’t catch us sitting at home. Those were the days!

Anyway back to my story.

I knew my father was a medical doctor. I mean, there was no way you could tell me otherwise. In short, I knew he studied medicine in school or Pharmacy. (Of course I eventually found out that he didn’t - when I was much older). Either way, my dad was a medical doctor! Full stop! If I had any form of injury or sickness or pain, I would trust only one person with that information – My dad. And yes, He would give me the proper medications for everything. We had a full functioning First Aid Box, hung on our wall upstairs! What other proof did I need? He would treat my wounds and make the pains go away. He would also tell me the healing process – and the healing always happened just as my dad said it would. He was my medical doctor. Can’t recall why my mum had to take me to the hospital sometimes though. But she did at some point. Maybe those cases were above my dad? Lol.

I recall growing up with so many people in the house. All sisters and brothers. We were just soooooo many. The house was always buzzing. So my big big sisters always asked us to stay upstairs. Lol. They were forever always in the kitchen, preparing one delicacy or the other. I remember thinking my older cousin was my eldest sister, and my dad, took care of us all – easily, and with so much joy. I mean, the house was always a happy place to be – everyday. Sounds cliché right? But it’s what it is.

My dad loved my mum so much.  She was the most beautiful woman in his eyes. No one could dare hurt her and not face my dad’s wrath. You can’t even disobey my mum or ‘report’ my mum. They just always had each other’s back – those two. Hmmmm. No surprise they ended up having 9 children. Hahaha

My dad was our Priest at home, our catechist, our prayer warrior, our adviser, I mean, the man never had to use the cane on me. He just always disciplined me with words. But when he is through talking to you – and calmly – you will look at yourself and ask yourself, why did I even do that? Didn’t I think? Yeah, his words were always true, and piercing when need be, but never abusive. Actually, I have never heard an abusive word from my dad’s mouth come to think of it.

My dad was so close to God, I always was scared of lying to him about anything. Because, when he goes to bed, God might just show him my entire life, so why bother lying? He was so close to God. They just sit and gist. Those days, as a teenager, I always prayed to God saying, “Father, you know my dad loves you so much and it will hurt him if you don’t do this…. For me, so please do it for me for the sake of your son – Leo’’ It always WORKED! Praise God though, I now have my own relationship with God.

You see, my dad loves animals, if I should count how many dogs we had or have, it will be more than 25, including the dogs we have buried. He had a pet – a cat, a big, fluffy and very fat cat- but he/she died when we were still kids. I can remember how pained my dad was when that happened. He never got himself another cat.

My dad was a church leader. Known as ‘Bro Leo’. And so, I was ‘Bro Leo’s daughter’. I think I was the black sheep in my house if we ever had one. No need to go into that story. But yeah, he was a leader in church, and somehow, everyone assumed the position of either ‘son’ or ‘daughter’ of my dad. I didn’t understand it then. Everyone – Literally everyone really, honestly felt like they were my dad’s biological child. I was young, I wasn’t really bothered and I knew my dad had a large heart, wide enough for the whole world. I also knew, the church was his home, and home was church.

I remember all his dad duties.

Yes, he took me to school. Even to my university.

Yes, he also brought me back from school too.

Yes, he checked up on me at night. Even coming to wake me and my sibling up in the middle of the night to pee - always.

Yes, he cooked for us. Oh! My dad can cook though!

Yes, he prayed for and with us.

Yes, ALL….. I MEAN ALL my financial issues, school fees, pocket money, clothes and shoes, school books, food, free money, everything money had to do with my life, my dad provided. Never once did I meet my mum for money. There simply was no need to. My dad was ALWAYS there.

Yes, he never argued with my mum.

And yes, I took it all for granted. I thought it was normal. I thought every dad did that. I thought, ‘hey, you are my dad, yeahhhhhh, you should love me, you should care for me, you should take full responsibility for me, you should discipline me with so much love.’ Until I was old enough, left the house and I realized, my normal was an abnormal. My dad was a dream! I talked about him and everyone assumed I was exaggerating.

Come-on!

“How can you tell me your parents never quarreled?” Or “you know all your dad’s activities?” Or “he never slapped you?” Or “Your dad never cheated on your mum?” etc. I used to get upset with all the questions. Why won’t they just believe me?

Yeah right. I know. It is hard to believe. He is not human. Truth is, even I don’t think he is human.

Now I know, I have a better understanding of who he really is. A better understanding of how he fully exhibits the 9 fruits of the Spirit. Yes. Not just one, all nine.  I can name them too if you want to know – He is Loving (love), always joyful (Joy), a peaceful man (Peace), Very patient, always listens to us till the end even when we are just saying a really long story (Patience), he is very kind (Kindness), He is a good man I dare say (Goodness), oh! A perfect gentleman too (gentleness), very faithful and committed to his duties as a father, friend, leader, CEO, etc (faithfulness), and he has so much self-control (self-control). His emotions do not control him at all. I don’t even know how he does it – well, I know, it is the Holy Spirit). All nine. He is full of the spirit. He has just one life – A CHRISTIAN LIFE - THE CHRIST LIKE LIFE. There was never a differentiator. It was never “oh, this is not church, its business” To him, it was either a Christ like living or a Christ like living.  He is a spirit, living in a body, and has a soul. Now I Know!

My dad was all that above, but, today – He is so much more. (Notice I kept using the past tense yeah? Lol)

On the 10^th day of the 6^th month every year, I write an article celebrating my dad on his special day. In 2017 however, I didn’t write one. It wasn’t because I was tired. No. It was because my articles never do him justice. I felt, I should stop making him out to be so little. But today, on Father’s day, I just had to express myself, or my childhood picture of daddy, even if you think little of him because of my write up, well, I can’t help it. My thoughts and my knowledge of him supersedes all.

Today, I thank my father for giving me such confidence and such wonderful childhood. I thank him for making my relationship with God Almighty, my Father, so real. I can comprehend a bit of how my father in heaven loves me because my dad has shown me who a good father is. My God is even much more.

Today I thank him for pointing out the bible to me, and being a living example for me, I believe all the bible says because you daddy, made it easy. For me, the Christian life is not so difficult. My dad lived it. And lived it well. He still lives it today.

Today, I know God’s words are true. “Train up a child the way he should grow and when he is old, he will not depart from it’’ those words are true. Take a look at me!

Because I have an understanding, that my earthly biological father loves me unconditionally, I boldly come into the presence of God daily, knowing His love surpasses all. My love for you Jesus, is so deep. You know. You can search my heart.

Today, and always, as my siblings and I do, we say to God our heavenly father, through Jesus our Lord - ‘Thank you for Daddy and Mummy. You gave us the BEST. Bless them for us and may their latter days be better than their former days in Jesus Name - AMEN.

Daddy, words are not enough, can never be enough, neither can it ever approiraitely express how my siblings and I feel, but for now, we will keep doing the best we can. The best way to say ‘WE LOVE YOU’ is to live according to the teachings and examples of Christ. We promise – we will. Not only because you taught and showed us first, but because now we have seen with our eyes and believe in our hearts that Jesus is LORD!

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY.

Your third daughter:

Chekz!